"Expectations that hurt...."

Through whatever years of life that i have been and by whatever understanding i have instilled in my mind i have come to realize that there are two kinds of expectations: a) Expectations that are plain expectations..with a plus-minus margin maybe.They are very practical expectations and they evoke very less emotional response.These are calculated expectations somewhere.For e.g they might be from yourself,like how you do in an exam,from your parents on your birthday,etc..common expectations that are a routine.. b) Are the expectations that are emotionally linked strongly and a slight or even a foretold imbalance regarding them creates a havoc inside u..you are torn apart..sometimes the damage is repairable..sometimes beyond repair! you are shaken to the core in no time!! THESE ARE THE EXPECTATIONS THAT HURT!! From two kinds of people you have expectations: 1) yourself 2) your loved ones 3) God (not included in people category/consider it only if you are a believer in destiny,god..) Lets us see how each kind of the category hurts and what maybe a possible remedy.. 1) expectations from yourself: When you are/have become very independent and are naturally/or molded to become self sufficient always i.e emotionally or otherwise,you land up hurting from the expectations you have from yourself...you tend to forget that somewhere you are going to be helpless or rather need someone's help..often such people are then misunderstood as being proud..but one thing the people who are tagging these people proud forget is that..sometimes its the experienced fear of no one coming to their aid when help is needed that makes these people what they are..And .. remedy for such(self expecting) people is: ..everyone makes some mistakes..even you will make just accept it.. ..not all things are under your control,so no point fretting over them ..those who matter will always know...and those who don't..well then learn that they shouldn't matter. 2) expectations from loved ones: If repeatedly yo are getting hurt from the one you love then first points to consider.. ..u love them well n good..but do they love u as much as u love them?? (in the case of repeated hurting i am not questioning the understanding or the wavelength between you and the other person..because if you love a person enough and you get to know you are hurting the one even you love then your that love will make you come to understanding to atleast avoid repetitive hurting!! so difference in understanding is never an excuse for repeated hurting!) remedy: ..not necessary every time you love someone..even they love you that much..(hard but true) ..everyone has his own priorities which may vary say from 0.001% to even 99% ..some things are neither good nor bad..they are just things u need to accept ..someone who is repeatedly hurting u and then saying sorry..make yourself tough n accept he is not loving u!!!!give chances, trust,believe,check ,no doubt people do change...but apply this only till 1)you can survive 2) are able to heal yourself 3)people change only if they want to!!! n only when they realize that they are doing injustice or being unfair!!! n no one on this earth can instigate this but they themselves!!! 4) learn to say no to things that may hurt u 5)forgive yourself if u hurt them a little in this process 6)if in hurting u even that person was getting hurt as much as you are getting hurt he wouldn't have hurt you..so if u cant change ppl you will have to change 7) sometimes its better to leave some ppl on their destiny..even wen u realize that they are going wrong way!! you are not god! n you cannot change their destiny..just pray for them or atleast avoid cursing them. 8)there are other people in you life who are waiting for your love..give them with both hands..don't sit with a sad face in front of them..turn all your hurt to love all those who deserve it much more!! Expectations from god.. Just remember the "footprints" story n else will be taken care of!!n if you don't know the story ask me anytime..pleasure to share the "footprints"!!!